I had only seen glimmers of her. As I mentioned in a previous blog, I’m only allowed to ask my son once a year if he has a girlfriend. I used that ticket by January 3, 2011. Because of my lack of self-control, I was moved into information prison, with no possibility for parole and no privileges to pry into the private life of my son.
Solitary confinement is hard for any loving mom. The good news is that even in the state penitentiary they have computers. Ryan must have forgotten that his mom makes her living on the world-wide web. So, if I’m friends with a friend of Ryan’s on Facebook and they happen to post a picture of my son and his girlfriend…..
I think everyone had met her before me. Well, I don’t think, I know. Ryan doesn’t bring any old girl home to old mom. If it’s a “Meet the Girlfriend” dinner, I know in advance, “This is the one in whom my son’s heart trusts.”
I was put on red alert sometime in May when Ryan told me he would be coming home in June with Kate. I resisted the temptation for the Spanish Inquisition. I sat by my Smartphone for close to a month waiting for the text that would tell me when and where.
The rendezvous was P.F. Changs. The hour was one p.m. I was 30 minutes early. The restaurant manager offered to seat me at a table, but I wanted to be able to instantly hug Kate when I met her. I pre-calculated the difficulty of that task in a semi-circle padded booth and opted to patiently wait in the foyer. Clearly, I had obsessed over every detail.
Suddenly there she was. The one in whom my son’s heart trusts. More beautiful than the ‘stolen’ Facebook pictures. My lovely than I ever imagined.
This month marks seven years since Megan’s preliminary cancer diagnosis. Kate, with her almond brown eyes and witty sense of humor brings new joy to my son. After seven years of walking through the valley of the shadow of death, I saw my son truly happy. Unmistakeable. Undeniable. My boy is happy.
Today, July 5, 2011, also marked the news that Ryan passed his national exam for Project Management. His career is flying. And for today my heart is soaring.
Valerie—I think your calling in this “next phase” of your life is definitely writing! I am soaring right along with you! And I’m sure your precious angel is as well……whether Kate becomes the permanent keeper of Ryan’s heart or the one that has helped him also move on from the despair of the past several years, God has sent her into his life and it is good. Bless you for your wonderful attitude.
I would love it if my future was devoted to writing! Thank you for sharing in the joy of my son’s happy life!
Today is a good day! I love it when hearts “soar”! Got Hannah’s MRI report today and her disease has not progressed. Still stable! Praise God! (She has been having more seizures and the dr. was worried, she was progressing!) Looks like you have an incredible “potential daughter-in-law”! Definetely looks like a keeper!! Keep soaring Val and keep writing! Sheri
I totally relate to your feelings as a mom, anxious to know yet trying to be patient. It’s such an adjustment from being the mom who knows everything from when they are hungry to when a new tooth is breaking through. Where exactly did those years go anyway?
SO HAPPY for Ryan and for YOU! Thanks for sharing and putting into words what every mom of a young adult feels. Great job, Valerie!
So happy for you! Beautiful couple!
Hi Valarie,
My name is Liz and I have been following your blog for sometime now. I am happy to hear that your son is happy, finally, with a nice and charming lady. I hope she remains lovely and charming and that he will finally be happy with her.
That said, since your blog is a great resource for someone going through cancer I wanted to reach out to you to see if you were interested in a new online social support network (that I am the community manager of!) called I Had Cancer. It is a new and free social support network focused on connecting people based on experiences with cancer so that they can easily communicate with one another and share information. I would love to tell you more if you are interested, so please let me know! Because I was so struck by your writing I would love to send you an early-access pass with extra invites for others you may know going through this journey.
Either way, thank you so much for your writing. Take care and best regards.
-Liz@ihadcancer.com-If anyone would like info on I Had Cancer please email me.
I love how you illustrated this story with your witty and positive words. A true proud mom. I now understand how my mom feels, thank you.
To love, success, joy and happiness.
Lovely Valerie,
I don’t know how I missed the notification in my email box that this post was out…(Yes, I do..my inbox is OUT OF CONTROL.) I’m just finally reading it today. For some reason, your post is reminding me of seasons….guaranteed to change…although it does seem like the winter often lasts longer than it’s allotted time. Praying for you today.
Hello there!
I am a student at the University of St Andrews, Scotland and I am currently doing a research project on the role of online blogs for individuals impacted by cancer. I was wondering whether I could talk to you about your opinions, I am especially interested in how bloggers can creatively express themselves(symbolically) in virtual environments and how important the blog design is in this process and why.But most importantly, how blogs can assist the individual in the healing process.
I hope that my research will promote online blogging as a critical resource and increase its awareness.
Please email me back if you would like to.
Thanks in advance
Laura